Fast break!

Life has been busy busy busy. I have a bunch of things I want to talk about but life just keeps on getting in the way! At the moment, I feel inspired to organize my kitchen spice cupboard AND work out. Neither of which ever happens. So I shall take advantage of those urges and just leave you with some videos and pictures.

My goal is to get the 4 month update for Miles done tonight! Be sure to check out my new page about Project 101 in 1001. I want to blog about that asap too! But first, my cupboard and workout.

This made me giggle and caused Ella to come running with our sling!

Aaron SAYS this wasn’t on purpose, but I don’t believe him. (I added the link in text because the video itself isn’t showing up in google reader. How lame is that?)

Ella enjoyed her first snow!

In Their New Pajamas

11 years ago tonight…

… it was snowing and my poor mother was THIRTEEN days past her duedate.

Things are rather blurry in my mind from that cold night but some very specific images stand out CLEARLY in my mind.

The apprentice midwife’s parents picked up my brother and I to come to the hospital to meet our new baby brother or sister. Dad couldn’t come because Mom’s labor was three hours from start to finish and he was told that if he left to get us, he’d miss the birth of his child. I remember the anticipation, excitement and thrill surging through me as I sat in their car, waiting to see if I had another brother or something brand new — a sister!

I remember sitting outside the room in the hallway with Grandma and Austin, bouncing my feet and generally being unable to be still. Then I noticed the door was opened a crack, so I crept forward and pushed it open a hair more. I could see through the sink mirror’s reflection a rolly polly new baby, pink and with a precious face. Then a nurse turned around, SAW ME, and quickly shut the door.

Then I was sitting in the recliner in Mom’s room, holding my NEW SISTER for the first time. The excitement and happiness threatened to overwhelm me and I thought that my grin was going to crack my face in two.

Having a sister is such an amazing relationship. She is so near and dear to my heart and she means the world to me. I love her to the moon and back. I am thrilled beyond words that my children have such an amazing person to be their “Aunt Nanny”. Savannah is such a caring, loving, funny, attentive, compassionate, spunky, and genuinely nice person. I can’t believe that she is no longer a little kid. She is rapidly becoming a young lady and such a pleasure to spend time with.

I wish we lived closer. Sometimes I cry because I miss her so much.

Happy birthday, Savannah Lou. I am honored to call you my sister.

Another thank you

Really feeling blessed over here on two fronts.

First of all, a big heartfelt thank you to someone who sent me an art pad in the mail. How did you know that was the exact one I pointed out to Aaron last week? I really appreciate your thoughtfulness. I’ve been using it and the oil pastels regularly and feel such a sense of calm after. Thank you!

And a big Thank You to God who finagled things so I didn’t have to have kidney stone removal surgery. I passed a HUGE kidney stone without trouble — without realizing it, actually! The doctor was rather shocked that I passed it on my own — he was convinced I’d have to have surgery to remove it. All I need to do now is collect urine for 24 hours (yes, just what you needed to read on a Monday night) to determine exactly WHY I have more kidney stones any old man should have, let alone a 20 something woman. I have something like seven stones left, which I am praying don’t shift to block urine (which is what causes kidney stone attacks). THAT is a kind of pain I NEVER EVER wish to experience AGAIN.

So yes. A great big huge THANK YOU to be shouted out to the universe and God.

Spotlight: Posts That Caught My Eye

Are YOU addicted?

Easy freezer food prep but I don’t think we’ll EVER have left over bacon!

Throw those resolutions out the window!

Why I believe in Santa. Be sure to have tissues. Or not. I also cry during Hallmark commercials.

Picking the pen back up

Stretching the shape of a soul hurts

Thank you

You know who you are. Thank you. Yesterday evening, Aaron brought in a box for me from the front porch. One of the folks who reads my blog AND has my address ordered me a set of oil pastels.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you. I have no idea who you are but I hope you are blessed tenfold in return.

Wordless Wednesday

Miles was quite the flirt at the Senior Citizen Christmas Dinner my mom put on! See the lipstick?

For more Wordless Wednesday, check out Five Minutes for Mom

On Prayer

Recently, I asked a friend for prayer for a specific thing in my life. Instead of giving me the typical, “Of course I will!” response, she quietly prayed for me right then and there. Nothing flamboyant. Nothing that sent me running to the dictionary. The prayer was very simple. “Lord, please give Dallas Ann peace and the grace to handle this. Amen”.  I felt overwhelming thankfulness for my friend’s willingness to go out of her comfort zone and minister to me in this way.

It has encouraged me to do the same thing. When friends ask me for prayer, I’m going to ask if I can right then and there. Why put it off and risk forgetting? I’ve been guilty of that before. There’s no need to put off what I could do immediately and risk missing the opportunity to bless others how I have been.

Our Tree

This is what I did tonight while both kids slept at the same time (!!!) and Aaron was away playing Halo something or another with guys. Yeah, it’s a bit silly to have a tree painted on drop cloth and hung on the wall but it’s totally 2 babies and 2 cats proof. I was inspired by my friend who painted a Christmas tree on the wall because they are in the middle of moving this holiday season.

The photo makes it look a bit awkward but I think that’s because I’m an awkward photographer! It’s really rather cute in person. Well, rustically cute. I kept on repeating “It doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful” like a mantra while putting it together. All things considered, I’m happy with the results. Someday, when the kids are older and the cats are dead, I’ll have an extravagant and gorgeous tree. In the mean time, I’ll embrace what I do have with my whole heart.

Mother Borg

Today I attended a mini morning retreat for ladies in the parenting group I’m a member of. The theme was “Relax and Reflect”. One of the reflection exercises was designed to force us out of “mommy mode” and reconnect with ourselves removed from being a good mom. We were to pick one characteristic or skill that we are awesome at and write it down.

I couldn’t think of anything.

Well, I could think of some things but they were all “good mom” related. I kind of wanted to cry. Where did I go? How did I get so disconnected from myself? I felt like I was immersed in a hive mindset, so to speak. Solely focused on my family, children, and spouse. Those are all VERY important things, vital to my life and essential to my world BUT having a mommy and wife who is one step away from becoming a Borg isn’t beneficial, either.

So where do I find the balance? Where do I locate ME, yet still maintain my focus on my 2 babies and spouse?

In the past, I’ve tried getting out of the house by myself or just with a young nursing baby (so far, all of my children are boob snobs and refuse a bottle. UGH.). I’ve tried escaping into books, the internet, and talking on the phone. While all of these options are good tools to use in moderation, I was missing a key point. In using these tools, I was trying to escape from the stresses of the day and ignore my reality. Yes, I do recognize the necessity of simply zoning out but if that’s all I do, where’s the recharging of my spirit? Where’s the energy to face the next meltdown or financial discussion?

At the mini morning retreat, I got some great ideas that I hope to implement. One that I hope to start as soon as possible involves art therapy. This morning, I made made my first Mandala. A Mandala is a drawn circle and the user fills it with shapes, colors, and lines. The goal is to draw like no one else is looking, and as if no one else will see it. You aren’t suppose to work towards the end product. The point is the process, not the end result. Then, when you feel like you’re finished, title and date it. At this point, you can throw it away, store it, or burn it. Basically whatever strikes your fancy!

The Mandala I created today was very calming for me. I focused on my immediate feels about this morning and expressed it in colors. By working through my emotions and viewpoints in an abstract manner, I was able to see things in a different light. I felt calm and emotionally centered. At that point, I decided that I needed to make a habit of this. I need to carve out just ten minutes from my day to sort out and process the way my day unfolded.

My goal is to try and do this every evening once I get supplies (that will be next week after we get Aaron’s unemployment check). I hope to get a spiral bound sketch book and some sort of art media. I thought that the oil pastels were pretty cool today but I should probably stick with crayons for the sake of frugality! On the front of each sheet, I’ll create my Mandala with a title and date. On the back of that page, I’ll journal two or three sentences about my creation.

I hope that by doing this, I’ll find a new tool to recharge and refill my emotional bucket. I’m even considering scanning and posting one Mandala a week to keep myself accountable. Is that too weird?

Going back to the inability to think of something that I rock at to write on my rock. Now that I’m home and have processed things more, I’ve come up with an entire list! A few things on the list include: being frugal, knitting, writing, cooking from scratch, and trip planning. It’s rather encouraging to realize I’m not a Borg Mom. Hopefully I can maintain my resistance to the hive mind through a new balance.